I’ve been hesitant to mention this on the blog, because doing so will require a personal confession. But I figured, what the hell. It’s a New Year, and I want to reward you, my faithful readers, with a little secret that (as a chronic masturbator) has revolutionized my sex life.

About three years ago, I started ordering used panties from this girl named Amy Lockheart. I know that may sound fucked up to some of you, but you’ll have to trust me on this… don’t knock it until you’ve tried it. Jerking off with a pair of hot, smelly panties is dramatically better than going solo. There’s something about that powerfully unforgettable, female fragrance that makes FAPPY Time HAPPY time.

But you don’t have to take my word for it. Amy’s Panties are cheap and available to all. So before you jerk it, splurge a little and get some used panties.